Cobwebs in the mind**

Outside OT.
Forehead-folds.
Sinking hearts.
Cold, numb senses.

One of my own.
Under surgeon's knife.
That medicine smell.
Tense, frantic paces.

Sudden giggles?
A baby voice.
Stretcher wheeled in.
Few anxious faces.

What a gory sight!
A million pipes!
Of nostrils and veins.
One of critical cases.

Giggles some more.
At ignorant ease.
At elders' tears.
Through playful lenses.

A girl of 3.
Eased the nerves.
Melted all hearts.
Amidst heart-wrenches.

**Reflecting on a true incident

Part C: The Punishment: Trilogy of Sweet Melancholy

I remember that day in 5th grade
The Math teacher's blood-shot eyes!
His favorite student had failed the class test
In effect, I had failed him
I could see the hurt in his eyes
Through dark-rimmed spectacles sliding onto his nose

I stood on the last bench - holding my ears
What an embarassment!
Abhay, Asha, Saurabh, Nishant had all passed
They'd look behind every few seconds
I was free entertainment!
It pained me - Who invented 'Punishment'?
How cruel!

In a strange parallel today, someone
Stands on the last bench in my memory
I've spared her the embarassment
She's excused from holding her ears :)
Endure she must though! As I bleed -

With every inch of gaping distance

With every recapitulation of past neglect

With every begging yearn

With every image of my lonely tomorrow

With every moment in my hibernation

She has failed me, miserably
This is her just punishment

As for me, I now realize
Why someone who loves and cares -
Punishes

Part B: The Hibernation: Trilogy of Sweet Melancholy

When your own smile, charges an appearance fee.
You buy from the market, what comes free.
In the strive, to build your finances.
You forget life's little, nuances.
On the career path, by its curves and bends.
You get no time, for your friends.
When between airports, and hotel lobbies.
You profitably trade, your favorite hobbies.

Know it's time, to stop and take.
A deep breath, and then a status check.

When so-called friends, stand their real test.
And emerge but, acquaintances at best.
Even those few, for whom you care so very.
All you get, is their periphery.
Your belief, faith and trust turns rotten.
The moments sweet, are so easily forgotten.
When you are sure that none will miss.
When it's time for the goodbye kiss.

Know it's time for graduation.
A long-deserved hibernation.

Another Night Must Be Endured**

Another night must be endured.
Amidst subdued whimpers.
Mourning the loss of moments stunned.
Another night must be endured.

As the pulse-beat drowns in the scream of pain.
Love will disappear in rampaging fault-lines.
No hope that the rays of dawn would shade.
To let night-bride wear silvery moonlight.
Fragrance of memory, though, will surely rise.
And the hopeful heart will pump once more.

Another night must be endured.

Blood-vessels will face the revolt thrust.
The pillow of truth will no-longer comfort.
Oh! I shudder to wake under closed eyelids.
To see lost fortunes in clear daylight.
Each heavy breath, though, will be weighed in gold.
And charged to the heads that hang in shame.

Another night must be endured.

**Adapted from the Hindi original 'Ek Aur Raat Kat Jaayegi' by Mirat Trivedi

Part A: The Substitute: Trilogy of Sweet Melancholy

Yes - It's true. I have found your substitute.
Take it from me - you were never indispensable.
Do not be proud of your shared past.
I have found your substitute.

We spend a lot of time lip-locked.
My fingers itch for that familiar touch.
The sweet aroma intoxicates.
Oh that brilliant spark at the touch of passion!
A fresh kick of life with every kiss!
Takes my breath away!
Addictive!
One just cant stay away!
Subtly filters my worries, insecurities - turns 'em to smoke.
Expensive to maintain - but so were you! (..Sorry..)

Don't be jealous. Please don't be.
Your substitute but knows all about you.
I have discussed you at length - over three meals a day.
Please don't go by hear-say.
Please don't grudge me my Marlboro Lights.
At long last - I have found your substitute.

Clinging onto Dear Life

Riding on the stroke of dawn
Comes every day the pearly dew
Oozing from the lazy yawn
Of the lotus leaf - the only friend it knew

"I wake you up from a hard night's sleep"
Spoke the dew "Coz I have lots to say"
"I conserve all day, thoughts carefully keep"
"To share with you, the very next day"

The whole world thinks, looks best the leaf
Only when the dew-crown it wears
The dew knows though - it imposes self
An extra load, the leaf charitably bears

Dew thinks aloud, hates imbalance
"Damn the lack of symbiosis!"
"Why this hopeless-hapless dependance?"
"Damn my birth of osmosis!"

"Excuse me!" bows out the leaf
The pearl slides down - Oh! It cuts like a knife
To see it hang by the tip of the leaf
And clinging onto dear life

Anonymous Existence

When was it last that you held a hand?

To come in the way, of a tottering fall?
To transfer faith, break a wall?

To find conviction, make your choice?
To collect your courage, raise a voice?

To comfort a friend, sans expectation?
Or is love just an aberration?


When was it last that you wore a smile?

To bring hope, to one who has none?
To bring shade, from the scorching sun?

Be it fake, to show "I'm fine"?
To mask sorrow, yet bring sunshine?

To assure someone that "I'm there"?
To evince trust and say "I care"?


When was it last that you shed a tear?

For the Lord you claim, as one of your own?
Yet do not yearn, conveniently disown?

For that shadow, who faithfully trails?
But in your neglect, silently wails?

At your heart's whispering insistence?
For that one stranger - an Anonymous Existence!